Hole in my Head

I was suddenly my younger self again.

I was planning on getting some kind of haircut, and I was on my school bus going back to home.

Some valley girl I didn't know started talking to me, and was trying to convince me to crack a hole in my head. I guess it was a new fashion fad.

I was told the hole could heal and grow back, and it's not as scary as it sounds. I noticed everyone had a hole in their head, when I looked around the bus.

So then eventually... I was like, alright fine! Which is very uncharacteristic of me, but anyway.

I grabbed some hammer out of nowhere, closed my eyes and struck myself in the back area of my head where the hair sprouts from.

And yup, it cracked open, just like that. Although it felt too realistic/visceral. I slowly rubbed my fingers all around the surface of my scalp to feel

where the hole is, and how big it is. I could feel the fragmented shards of skull on the rim of the crater, poking at my fingers.

And if i went deep in enough, i could feel my brain. Only barely, though. I was too scared to actually touch it. When I stuck

my finger down there however, I could feel just the warm air radiating from inside. Which was enough to petrify me.

My panicking started to set in immediately. "What if something fell inside of it?" "What if I get an infection?"

I got a towel quickly, and wrapped it around my head, in hopes of creating a barrier between my exposed brain, and the "real" world.

The bus finally dropped me off near home, and my sisters were waiting for me. And considering my luck, of course it started raining.

I could feel every rain droplet soak through the towel, drip, then beat against my brain. Everytime it happened, I dipped my head into my shrugging shoulders instinctively.

However, telling my sisters about this, expecting empathy and help, they just shrugged it off, and we continued to walk.

Isn't that just the worst feeling? When something horrible is happening, but no one in your dream is reacting to it properly?

I want to learn how to lucid dream for many reasons, but one of which, is that if that ever happens to me again, I want to punch a hole through everyone's fucking heads.

Anyway, eventually, I couldn't handle it, knowing the whole "it growing back" thing was probably a lie, or some kind of misunderstanding.

So I just started crying and panicking really. Don't remember how I woke up, but fuck that, man.

❤ BACK ❤